For those who see the brighter side of life and don't always need the sun to shine because they carry it inside them, it can be a challenge trying to avoid others who complain. We don't have to be around people who take a liking to pointing out all the bad things in life.
Instead, we can choose to be around people who share the same enthusiasm and zeal for life's expected, and unexpected, occurrances and opportunities.
If you're looking for a few helpful strategies for avoiding complaints, try these:
1. Don't do it yourself. The best way to stay away from complaints is not doing it yourself. Ziglar says, those with nothing to do will do it with you. Without something positive or productive to do, people complain. If you find lots of complaining people around you, it may be time to re-evaluate who you are around.
2. Be the conversation starter. When you know someone is a complainer and they come to you to 'talk,' start the conversation by saying something like, "Hey Jamie, good to see you, how can I help you today?"
By giving the person a cordial greeting you're starting things off on a brighter note, then asking how you can help lets the person know you're available to do something good, but it also cuts down the opportunity for them to meaninglessly talk to you about whatever they choose.
Asking how you can help makes the other peson think about what they need before talking with you. It also let's them know you have other things to do, but you're kind enough to help them out, if they need it.
3. Use an exit strategy. If you find yourself in the middle of a conversation with someone who complains, have a few tried and true methods for politely leaving the conversation. For example, say to the complain person, "Oh, Wow! There's Johny, I haven't talked with him in a long time, would you please excuse me?" Or, "My goodness, it's getting late in the afternoon, would you excuse me to go finish some work I started earlier?" Or simply say, "Would you please excuse me?" and walk away quickly as if you need to do something important.
In situations like this it's best to follow a few guidelines; first, don't lie or make up anything, be honest. Second, talk positively and leave on a good note. Third, be kind, but firm, make sure you end the conversation politely and don't get dragged in to more complaints.
Remember that you're talking to a complainer and they're likely to complain about you to someone else, so be truthful, leave on a good note, and be kind, but firm.
4. Lean on your reputation, it's okay to say no. If you're known for being someone who doesn't complain, and get's things done, people who want to be that way will want to be around you. You've heard of the saying, "birds of the feather flock together."
When people know you get things done they'll also give you more to do. Don't take on everything, when you take on more than you can handle, you get stressed, and this brings on frustration, and frustration is the mother of complaints. Learn to say no, graciously.
When someone comes to you with something to get done, they may not always need you to do it, they may just be looking for some help in getting it done themselves. When you say, "No, I'm sorry I won't be able to complete that, but I know someone who could help you with it," your helping someone with their problem, keeping it from becoming your own, and still have your reputation in tact.
Complaining is a road block for productive people. It's like the old saying, "Complaining is like throwing up, it makes you feel better, but causes everyone else to be sick." Using the strategies above will keep you from being a roadblock, and more like an autobahn where people move around and get things done as quickly as they need.
